As a creative and entrepreneur, I’m constantly rating my performance on how much I’ve accomplished in the day. “Accomplishments” are regularly under scrutiny given that an empty inbox feels arguably satisfying, yet does nothing for my business and creativity.
I’m forever reading pro-tips on productivity, but some days just break all the rules all on their own. I had ambitious intentions, I swear!
The feeling of never having done enough, is always looming–I’m sure you can relate.
Recently I read a refreshing Brene Brown quote: “I define wholehearted living as engaging in our lives from a place of worthiness. It means cultivating the courage, compassion, and connection to wake up in the morning and think, No matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough.”
Some days flossing my teeth and rinsing the dishes (note: not washing them, just rinsing) are considered high points on the scoreboard.
Life: 10 Me: 4
I’m still working on the NOT feeling defeated part.
I’ve recently started to see nurturing activities for myself as weighing in with greater difficulty, ie. evening yoga/stretch, walk in the park, bath, book, creative play, etc, the inner judge is even learning to score those appropriately;)
I find when I’m great in one category, I’m sucking in another. It’s like a juggling act where I’m running around wailing like a banshee trying not to let any of the fiery pins drop.
I remind myself of the days, in my early 20’s, where getting out of bed was difficult, and my biggest accomplishment was changing out of pajamas. That broadens the perspective a bit.
In that light, brushing my teeth and leaving the house is considered a big win, which means I’m winning every-DAAAAAAAAY!
Being an adult sucks, as my best friend, Katie, loves to say. There’s all kinds of pressure to keep those juggling pins afloat. I could sense the judgement from a friend the other day when I admitted it had been a minute since I’ve seen the dentist. Tsk, tsk.
I think she shamed me into making an appointment, which only means another pin will likely collapse somewhere;)
That’s how it works though right? It’s like Sisyphus and his boulder. A thankless job that no one but us can do.
How I see it, since we can’t ignore the dishes, the litterbox, the therapist panicking because the insurance effed up the claim, the parking ticket, the bourrage of birthday parties and baby showers, the jury duty, we do our best, and that’s it. Nothing more, nothing less.
Some days my best is flossing, some days not so much;)
Part of adulting is accepting that all the pins will drop every now and then, and that’s OK.
We build teams around us (colleagues, neighbors, friends and family) so that when we raise the white flag, someone will hopefully come to our rescue.
One of Elisa’s favorite phrases: “I quit [life]!” Which is short for, “I need rubs and kisses pronto or there’s gonna be a meltdown–not kidding–right here, right now.”
That happens about once a week;)
Regardless of what gets done, Elisa and I make a point to remind each other, as Brene Brown says, we are, just as we stand, enough!
Advanced adulting is having the courage and compassion to say it to yourself.
I leave you with this: What’s your biggest gripe about being an adult? Naming what sucks is liberating!